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Lullabies

Hush little baby, don't you mope:
Papa's going to buy you an oscilloscope
And if that oscilloscope won't lock
Papa's going to buy you an atomic clock
And if that atomic clock is slow
Papa's going to buy you an air-band radio
And if that radio has no scanner
Papa's going to buy you a ham radio antenna
And if that antenna doesn't receive
Papa's going to buy you an LCD
And if that LCD has a flicker
Papa's going to buy you a pocket protector
And if that pocket protector doesn't fit
Papa's going to buy you a logic chip
And if that logic chip has no power
Papa's going to buy you an amplifier
And if that amplifier has no gain
Papa's going to buy you a model plane
And if that plane flies away
Papa's going to buy you a PDA
And if that PDA doesn't dock
Papa's going to buy you a new laptop
And if that laptop doesn't boot
Papa's going to buy you a laser tube
And if that laser tube don't glow
Papa's going to buy you a spectroscope
And if that spectroscope has no spectra
Papa's going to buy you a continuity tester
And if that tester doesn't glow
Papa's going to buy you a combination DVD and video
And if the video has no sound
Your still the sweetest baby around.

The Twelve Dogs of Christmas

One the twelfth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me :

Twelve dachshunds dashing,
Eleven pointers pointing,
Ten labs a leaping,
Nine dalmatians prancing,
Eight mutts a mooching,
Seven shorthairs swimming,
Six beagles baying,
Five golden retrievers,
Four collie dogs,
Three French poodles,
Two great Danes,
And a Pomeranian in a pear tree.